Blog – Page 16 – Tahmid Chowdhury

Maintaining healthy relationships as an adult

Since the new year, I’ve been reflecting on my relationships with others. I have a habit of losing touch with people I know. I then feel like I don’t actually have friends. Does this sound familiar?

The pandemic has broken a lot of our social norms. People we used to meet on a day-to-day basis are no longer conveniently in front of us. At first we tried regularly video calls, but these seemingly fell away after a while (at least they did for me, anyway). We’re now finding it harder to build back social lives outside of those who we have been in lockdown with. If you’re like me, you may have forgotten that there’s a world out there!

That said, this is an issue which affected me pre-pandemic. Working in a large city, my routine would usually be waking up groggy, dragging myself to work, going through a rollercoaster day, then going home sapped of energy. Any chance of meaningful engagement with friends or family was lost as I was too tired to commit to anything.

Like many people, my younger years tended to be my more social. Whilst in university it was far easier to meet like-minded people. However, going into adulthood put me in the mix of the big wide world of people with different priorities, as well as tasking me with adult responsibilities. It’s no wonder that I struggled. In the past, it was easy just to make friends without trying. In the adult world, you have to put much more effort in.

Energy is important. When I did actually get around to seeing friends, perhaps after work, it would usually be talking about work, moaning about the things on my mind and noting how I’m tired or stressed. The other person would also reciprocate for a while, after which we would pack our bags and go home. Hardly a meaningful conversation(!).

In the days of being subsumed by work, everything else tends to suffer. It is hard to be present with others when all we are doing is reliving work related issues in our head.

I used to go through a cycle of feeling very antisocial, prompting me to suddenly reach out to people. This was obviously quite sporadic, and in hindsight was not surprising that I found awkward; re-connecting with people takes more effort the longer you haven’t spoken. So if you want to have good, long-lasting relationships, you cannot disappear off the face of the earth for six months – something I’m certainly guilty of!

Self-narrative plays a huge part. I see-saw from believing I am an antisocial person, to someone who is extremely interested in people. Often this can change within the space of a day. I actually recently explored this subject with my coach. I have built up this narrative that I was unable to speak with people because I was poor at making friendships. I built this based upon the fact that I did not have many friends when I was at school. Things such as people mentioning ‘best friends’ or talking about all their ‘friends’ tended to leave me uncomfortable. I don’t easily define my relationships in such a way.

The bit that I forgot was that I can also be extremely sociable. When I was at university I got to know lots of people, a mix from my course, social activities and bumping into them in our little accommodation village. It turns out I did like spending time with others, certainly so when I had the time and energy for it. I was also quite good at having meaningful conversations too. My tendency was to get to know lots of different people, and find interest in that difference.

For me, I’ve learnt that the line between ‘best friend’, ‘friend’ or even ‘acquaintance’ can be blurred. The best thing I did was to stop worrying about how I labelled my relationships, as the moment I put someone in the box of ‘friends’ I thought there was some particular set of actions I had to follow. In reality, relationships can be whatever they need to be, and that is liberating.

For a truly meaningful relationship with anyone, whether that be friend, client, customer or even foe, there is a surprising commonality. Bringing your full attention to that person and without a pre-conceived agenda makes for a greater, more honest relationship. None of us like to be rung by that ‘mate’ who always needs something from you. So don’t be that person when with others.

This is an area that I’m working on myself. I endeavour to build better relationships with the people around me. So if I reach out to you, know that I am coming with an attempt to build better relationships rather than needing anything from you in particular!

As an adult, how have you found maintaining relationships with others?

How’s that New Years Resolution going? I failed mine already

I’m extremely disappointed in myself. Despite all my hard work, I managed to fail my New Years Resolution.

I did all the hard yards, planning and preparation. Yet four days in, my ambitions for 2022 are in tatters.

Perhaps I’m being hard on myself. After all, my New Years Resolution was to win the lottery and all I did was buy a ticket at the Post Office (well, I also did check if I won). At least I can say I completed those action correctly. Perhaps I can try again next year.

If you couldn’t tell, I write this tongue-in-cheek. If you’ve seen me speaking about it recently, I am not a fan of New Years Resolutions. Whilst I think having a moment to reflect on the year gone by is helpful as we come up to end of December, it’s also quite arbitrary. Let’s not forget that we’re being prompted by a date on the calendar.

It strikes me as even weirder that we use this calendar-prompt as a reason to decide what we are going to do for the next year. After all, I don’t know what I’m going to be doing in a week, let alone in six months. I would guess we do this as a mix of societal pressure and weird personal aspiration. Yet I think we all know that neither of these are particularly conducive to successful personal change. It’s no wonder why most people fail with their New Years Resolution (or if you’re like me, forget I even made one). This then leaves people feeling guilty and actually less likely to commit to change.

I am a big believer in personal development. People can change. People can make themselves better. Yet to do so takes a lot of work. Having motivation, making a plan and working with a coach makes it more likely. Inspiration for change also come at any point. I suddenly decided to start my podcast in December, since I was feeling motivated. So I went ahead and did it.

So what if you do genuinely want to change? Here are some thoughts to prompt you:

Find a sustainable motivation for wanting it – if your goal is to lose weight, is there something more profound than simply ‘because you probably should’? How about wanting to feel healthier and reconnect with hobbies you’ve lost touch with.
Make it achievable – in the height of new years eve drama, we can all be guilty of building monumental expectations of what we want to do over the next 365 days. Yet we greatly underestimate how long things take. Jeff Bezos would use the example that people think it would take two weeks to learn how to do a good handstand. In reality it takes around six months of daily practice.
Create a plan – Planning will help give an idea of how you want to reach your goal. They don’t have to be overly detailed – after all, plans go awry and life happens. This will at least give you an idea of how to start, and you can always adapt it later. If you find you’ve misjudged your plan, you can learn from that experience and be better at planning for the next time.
Start when you’re ready; stop when you need to – Change is an emotionally tiring, yet rewarding process. It’s important to be mentally prepared, and start when you are actually ready. So start when you say so, rather than when someone else tells you. Likewise, life can get in the way, so it’s okay to slow down if you need to. Although a goal can be a good prompt for change, you may need to readjust depending on the circumstances.
Find external support – It’s hard to do things alone. So find ways you can get support for the changes you want to make. Whether that be from family and friends, or finding a supportive group. I worked with a coach throughout the biggest changes in my life, which enabled me to work through the mental barriers. These included feeling fear, confusion and lack of direction. This experience prompted me to help others with their changes by becoming a coach.

Are there any changes you would like to make? I’d love to hear about them in the comments!

the tale of: the presentation on clear messaging

Post author By tahmidchowdhury
Post date December 29, 2021
Categories In Satire

I’ve been inspired to try satirical writing. So as a bonus second article this week, here’s a short tale for you. It is different different to my usual posts, so I would love to hear if you enjoy it. For what it’s worth, I enjoyed writing it.

***

The clock strikes 13:07. Senior Assistant Director Robert Roberts of Growth Impact Synergies Corporation Inc. clears his throat to usher attention. The crowd quietens with anticipation. Well, this is a virtual meeting so there isn’t any noise, and the anticipation is wanting this to be over with as soon as possible.

‘I am delighted to welcome you to our second growth synergisation information session, otherwise known as our Learn and/or Lunch series’ said Robert. ‘Last week we had an extremely interesting session on wellbeing and taking breaks. I personally learnt a lot, and it was a shame we had to cut it short so people could go to their meetings at 2. Still, the great thing about this format is being able to multitask eating with learning so no loss there.’

‘This week, I am delighted to welcome Angela from our Media Communications Information Intelligence Team, who will be talking to us about clear messaging.’

‘It’s great to be here’ said Angela. ‘We want this to be an extremely interactive session. As such we’ve made this a 35 minute session, although we’ve already lost seven of those because the Director meeting overran. Nonetheless, I will try and get through my presentation as quickly as possible.’

Angela starts sharing her short presentation of 47 slides. John from HR, one of the attendees, wondered whether there would be enough time to get through it all. However, he was unable to say anything as there was no time for input.

‘In order to have clear messaging, or as we like to call it, dynamic information extrapolation and dissemination, or DIED for short, it is important to explain what we mean at each step’, said Angela, without explaining dynamic information extrapolation and dissemination meant. Angela set out how important it was to be clear internally on what each other was doing. It was for this reason the Media Communications Information Intelligence Team held two hour meetings every morning where they each gave a short 15 minute update. For the rest of the business, it was now clear why their team never responded to emails before 12pm.

Angela spoke for another 30 minutes until it became apparent there was no time left. Senior Assistant Director Roberts who had been checking his emails, realised Angela had stopped talking. He quickly turned his microphone back on. ‘Errr, thanks Angela for that…fascinating presentation. I took a lot away from it, such as, well, you know, I think it spoke for itself. I know we are out of time, but I wondered whether there are any questions?’. Junior Assistant Director Mo Gates puts up his electronic hand. The audience groan (which would have got them in trouble if it weren’t for their muted microphones).

‘Hi, thanks so much for a great presentation, and a special thank you to Robert for organising.’ said Mo, who happened to be managed by Robert. ‘I was wondering whether the Growth Impact Synergies Corporation would benefit from greater synergising across teams to ensure enhanced cooperation’.

‘Yes excellent point Mo, I think we could all benefit from greater synergising across teams’ said Angela.

‘You took the words right out of my mouth Angela’ Robert added, ‘synergising is our greatest strength and we only great stronger through it. I hope in the future we can find new ways of cross-team synergisation through clear messaging. Well, great I have to go as I’m already 10 minutes late to a session with my mentee. That was an excellent session, and sorry once again that we have overrun by 20 minutes as I know some of you have to present to our biggest client now. But as we learnt from last week, it’s important to have a break, so remember – take time away from your laptops and go for a walk.
‘

Before ending the meeting, Robert said: ‘Next, we have a Learn and/or Lunch on efficient ways of working. I think we’ll need to postpone that till next month though since our Director meeting will run over, and the week after is a holiday. Anyway, I’m sure we’ll get to it some point. Thank you all for listening’.

Making Sense of 2021

Building a narrative over a full year is usually tough. I often forget most of what I did towards the beginning of the year.

This year is particularly troublesome, as post-March 2020 and 2021 melded together as one relentless monotony. Pre-pandemic life feels a distant memory, with our changes to lifestyle and work now feeling like no other alternative ever existed.

Although this piece is around reflection towards the end of 2021, I wonder how beneficial it is to reflect purely based upon the end of a 365-day cycle. Much like New Years Eve, it feels an arbitrary date which has little relation to how our lives really play out. Is the end of a year really an end?

Still, I find benefit in having a yearly cue. Without it, I would simply forget to do so, and put my attention in the next banal task after another. Heaven knows we don’t take enough time to understand ourselves. So if it helps prompt introspection, this yearly tradition serves its purpose.

2021 was an odd year. I achieved many of my goals, yet did not feel particularly happy. I find myself confronting a myth I have created for myself – that if I achieved all my goals – this would lead me to fulfillment. As far as my checklist goes, I completed numerous qualifications, moved country, changed jobs and built this newsletter. I also recently started a podcast. No doubt many other things too.

If I marked my year in terms of achievement it would be pretty high. I ticked many boxes and have lots of nice pieces of paper saying I was more qualified than I was 2020. Why then am I not delighted with this year?

Well, a worldwide pandemic does not help. Basic actions have an undercurrent of self-doubt on whether the risk was worth it. Stressful activities like moving house became even more so with a few quarantine periods thrown in too.

But even without a worldwide pandemic, I think this would have been a year of change for me. Change is rarely comfortable. Dust needs to settle, and sometimes that takes longer than a calendar year.

At the end of 2019 I was unhappy and wanted things to change. My life was centred around work, and I found little other purpose in my existence. As it evolved, 2020 became a year where I started to open my mind. This came through developing myself, and finding new pursuits such as yoga. 2021 was putting many seismic changes in place. Changing location and job also meant a change in identity. I am no longer a Londoner, nor working in Government. Instead, I am a foreigner working on sustainability issues. Roots of a tree need time to grow.

I leave 2021 with a sense of hope. I hope that making changes this year will benefit my future. Looking into 2022, I am optimistic I can find that greater fulfillment I’m looking for.

Taking time to develop our writing skills

The word ‘writing’ suggests an artistic craft which only authors do. Yet every day we type emails, comment on posts and message our friends. With the boom of internet communication we are spending more time writing. However, we spend very little time actively developing how we write. Much written information we read and write is non-fiction. In a business setting, our emails and memos set direction. Writing well is therefore key.

I’ve spent the last week reflecting on my work around this newsletter. This was prompted by reading a book around blog writing, which made me concerned that perhaps my articles were a little unfocussed. I did a recent LinkedIn poll, where I was happily surprised to see the majority of people prefer that I write about a variety of subjects rather than an individual theme. (I am always open to feedback though, so please do get in touch around things you like, dislike or want to see more of!).

With my recent focus upon blogging, I realised that I had fallen into this trap. It has been years since I reflected on my writing style, and how I could improve, which for someone writing a blog on personal development, it is not the best example to set! Following a quick Google search, I stumbled upon a recommendation for On Writing Well: the classic guide to non-fiction by William Zinsser, which is renowned on this subject.

I am half-way through reading, yet I have already gained plenty. Of all the principles, brevity, I think, is the most important. Unfortunately, through university we have gained an overly-elaborate writing style. This often means we see long and confusing messages with complicated vocabulary. The point of writing is to give clarity, rather than demonstrate your intelligence. Zinsser pushes us to consider the words we use, and edit out the padding. Even in the last sentence, I first typed this as ‘Zinsser pushes us to better consider the words we use’ – the word ‘better’ is unecessary, and the sentence is clearer without it.

The book also highlights the importance of bringing humanity into our text. I was honestly relieved to read this – I try to give my own perspective as I’ve found it is more interesting, so it is reassuring to read. He also says that people should write the way they speak, which makes sense. If you do not use fancy words when speaking, there is no need to put them in whilst writing (conversely, if you do use them, do write them).

Finally, I gained lots from the answer to his question ‘who am I writing for?’. We often hear about the importance of writing for your audience. Instead, his response is that you should write for yourself. Editors and writers do not know what they want until they have read it. Writing is an act of enjoyment, and if you enjoy writing your readers are more likely to enjoy it too. I found this incredibly refreshing in an age of social media, where we craft texts which are built upon chasing likes. This mantra – from a book written over 30 years ago – is sage advice.

Zinsser is meticulous with his editing and re-editing. I am personally less of a zealot – I believe the important thing is to write something and improve it to a ‘good enough’ level before publishing. Many of us get blocked from writing due to a perfectionist streak or a lack of time. I prefer to emphasise output rather than perfection.

I’ve learnt that my writing improves through brevity and humanity. I tend to add needless ad-verbs, or write in a roundabout way. Looking at what I see in emails and across social media, I believe those who come across best follow these attributes.

Why did I decide to start a podcast?

Last month, I listened to an interview with Lucy Gourlay, a coach who had started a podcast called ‘Lucy Loves‘ over the last year. She detailed her trials and tribulations of whether to start it or not, and how it had since become a key part of what she does, ultimately supporting her business.

Fast forward a few weeks, I found myself releasing my first ever podcast episode, in a whirlwind journey of setting up tech, deciding on a name/concept and finding a first interviewee. So what pushed me to make the decision of starting ‘Behind the Suit and Tie‘?

The idea of a podcast has been in the back of my mind for a while. As a student, I had previously co-hosted a weekly radio show for three years; it was a Wednesday morning ritual which started nervously and awkwardly, but as time passed we improved and became relatively fluent. At some point we even won an internal award as the Best Playlist Show at one point, which we didn’t really expect. That being said, it’s been a many years since that took place, and honestly I actually had forgotten that I had even done any of that.

As to why I started this now, there were a few reasons that culminated together. Firstly, I had a push from listening to this interview, so I felt it was about time I acted upon an idea I have had for a while. Secondly, whilst it has been pointed out to me that the world does not need another podcast, it actually benefits my own wellbeing. I enjoy releasing my creative side through these blogs which gives me a wider sense of achievement outside of my job. I wanted to expand the sorts of things I do in a new area, and podcasting is something I think I can do well. Thirdly, the concept of Behind the Suit and Tie is to learn more about people and make work more human, something I have become more interested in as a theme as I have progressed in my career (as well as the trials and tribulations of the pandemic!).

It’s interesting to reflect how helpful an outside prompt can be – by listening to that interview I had a nudge to get going with something I had been thinking about for a long time. Once that happened, the seed was planted and I was keen to learn about how to make it a reality. Fortunately we live in a world where it’s possible to access guides relatively easily, as such I bought a book which gave some clear guidance relating to things like tech, recording an intro and outro and how to commission a cover art (the latter of which I’m very happy with!).

It also made me reflect that practicing skills in the past can always come in useful many years later. If you’re looking to start a new activity or hobby, but are questioning whether it is worth it – my answer would unequivocally be yes! I was fortunate that I had access to student radio and had a co-host who actually was more enthusiastic in the show than I was. But by doing this weekly, I learnt how to better use my voice, how to do basic sound editing and how to organise a timetable for a show.

My final reflection is how quickly you can go with an idea once one’s mind is set towards it. Because I had gotten into the idea of making a podcast and had set the concept, the awkward barriers suddenly just felt like hurdles to overcome in quick succession. A lot of what prevents us as people from starting new things is our own mental uncertainty, and once that melts away tasks that felt like massive barriers can be overcome far easier. For me, I took a lot of these things in my stride.

So I would love it if you gave Behind the Suit and Tie a listen: do check out my first episode here – https://anchor.fm/tahmid5. If you’re interested in being a guest, please do get in touch, I’d love to find new people to speak to!

My reflections three months into a job transition

A few weeks ago, I wrote about my decision to leave government. I’ve now started a new role and have been working here for the last three months. Moving to a new job is a stressful time, though particularly so when moving to a new sector or shifting career. For me this was also combined it with moving countries, as well as having to do so during the pandemic which just made everything more complicated.

So I thought I would share some early reflections of what helped me settle into my new role, and the pitfalls to avoid when shifting careers, based upon my recent experience.

Before starting – think about your new role, but don’t sweat the details

For me, I was shifting topic area into the world of climate change and sustainability, something that I didn’t have direct experience in. So when I knew I would be moving into this role, I tried to start building my understanding, reading books, listening into webinars and generally getting my head around some of the complexities of the subject.

That said, I realised that I was putting pressure on myself to know everything before I even started. I was hired based upon my current skills, and there was always an expectation that it would take time for me to get to grips with the new work. I was fortunate enough to have a break between starting roles (which I would also definitely recommend), and there came a point where I realised the best thing I could do was resting to feel fresh for the new role. Whilst some preparation did help, realistically I would never be able to learn it all within a few weeks. Instead, it was more important to set myself up mentally to take in lots of information when the job started.

2. On your first days and weeks, spend more time listening then talking

I remember my first day as a mixture of some nerves and excitement. It was a fairly intense introduction into the work we do and meeting people. Meanwhile, setting up IT and going through inductions took a while and was fairly tedious.

Sifting careers at a mid-level role brings its own challenges. Whereas when you join as a graduate or from an entry-level, there is an implicit understanding that you are there to learn your role from your seniors. For me though, I knew that my role was to set direction, with expected management responsibilities. So there was certainly a temptation to start impressing my colleagues with my knowledge and ideas from the first week to demonstrate that I was ‘up to the task’. In reality, this was more an internal anxiety rather than a particularly helpful reflex. If I had done this, I probably would have made some blunders as it is hard to give useful suggestions without knowing much about what is going on.

The first few weeks are the point you can learn the most, simply by approaching people with an open mind and listening to their thoughts and opinions. I took this opportunity to have different intro chats and have conversations to get to know my colleagues better, rather than jumping into the work to start crunching out the tasks I knew I would need to do. This allowed me to get a better idea of different projects, personalities and work cultures before diving head first into work.

3. Be open to a different way of doing things

Moving roles naturally means going to somewhere else where things are done differently. That’s obvious, right? Nonetheless, having worked around five years in government, I quickly became accustomed on ow ‘things should be’. So moving roles outside, there were basic things like meetings, HR and IT which were different to what I had previously been used to. So it was important for me to observe what this looked like to learn the way things were done here.

For me, I had to be open to a different style of working, particularly so as I was both moving from government (where decisions are made internally) to my current role where we look to influence through engaging from the outside. Furthermore, moving from the UK to Belgium also brought changes in terms of work cultures and the way in which people interact with one another, which is an area I have needed to adapt.

4. When the time is right, do not be afraid to demonstrate your value

The previous points were around listening and adapting. However, it is also important to remember that you were hired for a reason – you bring valuable experience and insight into your new organisation. For example, I bring a particular interest around certain areas such as wellbeing and diversity and inclusion, as well as project management having completed numerous courses on all of these areas. So I also have found it important to demonstrate that I have these skills when the opportunity arise. It has helped me to visibly demonstrate what I bring to the team in terms of experience, where my values are and how I can be helpful when integrating within a team.

There also came a point when I shifted from being a passive spectator, instead expected to drive my own work. In other words, hesitating and waiting for others to tell me what to do constantly is not what I was hired to do. Here I could pull in my experience from previous roles which set me up nicely to lead projects which were similar to what I had done before (which makes the penny drop somewhat as to why I got hired in the first place!). It was important for me to be humble about the things I did not know, which is fairly natural when starting in a new organisation, so building good relationships and asking for help is also key.

5. Don’t forget about your hobbies and outside interest

I was certainly tempted to put my life ‘on hold’ whilst I got accustomed to my new role. Whilst this is naturally going to be a stressful period, it is also important for your own wellbeing to find things that you enjoy doing. This has been particularly important during the pandemic where it has been hard to get away from work, due to the limited activities still available.

For me, I have been writing these articles on LinkedIn for over a year now, and I found it an extremely valuable source of accomplishment and wellbeing, since I can channel my creativity and provide a benefit for those that read it. So whilst I did take a little time before restarting, I’ve been keen to continue in writing these throughout the first few months. It is also good for my own confidence, as doing something I know how to do can counterbalance a day where I may have spent feeling quite lost or unsure about the new topic I was grasping with.

These are my reflections three months into a job transition. I would love to hear your views – has this been helpful for you, are there other pieces of advice you would give?

Are we too obsessed with the concept of growth?

I’ve been recently reading about doughnut economics – the economic concept around how we consume as a society. In essence, the idea of the doughnut is that we should aim for the ‘ring’ of a doughnut to be our level of consumption. Any less than this leads to a shortfall, causing lack of education, famine and disease. Any more leads to overconsumption, damage to our planet and climate and issues such as biodiversity loss.

A large portion of our economic indicators are based upon GDP growth. Over the last century, our main idea of measuring a country’s success is as to whether it has GDP growth or not. GDP has often been heralded as the mark of doing ‘better’, and it is only recently that we have started to question this whole concept in mainstream discussions. Arguments for higher GDP growth are also complemented by arguments of trickle-down economics, i.e. that GDP growth will lead to benefits for the wider society. Unfortunately, modern society has shown that in reality an unbelievable amount of wealth is owned by the top 1%, who according to Inequality.org own approximately 43% of the wealth of the world, which rather than reduce, has actually increased.

We are now seeing a shift in perspective on how we view our economy starting to emerge. The doughnut leads us to think more holistically about our effect on a planet, and instead think about other measures such as wellbeing, happiness and sustainability. This is still quite a mindset shift which will need to take place – the idea that our aim may be to increase wellbeing but to not increase GDP (or even decrease) still feels like a radical idea. After all, we want to grow, get bigger, better and stronger.

This wider economic debate got me thinking about the idea of growth itself, including from our own perspective on personal development. As a coach, we often love using the word growth as a strong visual image of improvement – it harks to our childhood where we grew to fully formed adults. And yet, this obsession with the idea of growth may actually be unhealthy. After all, do I need to grow? My waist size certainly doesn’t!

I think our strong attachment to the idea of growth can mislead us. From an economic perspective, it can give the idea that getting bigger is always a positive thing, which furthermore trumps any other economic or social considerations. From a personal development perspective, the idea that we need to grow and ‘get better’ is often quite inhibiting when what we really need to do is take a step back and reflect – (One of the most common coaching techniques is even called ‘GROW’ which probably doesn’t help!). This can often reflect itself in the aims of a development conversation – to get a promotion, higher salary or be more productive.

What we are often aiming for is a change, transition or transformation of our behaviour. This is often difficult as it makes us re-evaluate what is important to us, and how we may act in our day-to-day interactions. However, when we constantly frame this in the idea of ‘growth’ we can build an element of guilt into this – if we are not constantly improving day by day we are failing in our quest to become ‘better’.

Even as a coach, I can fall into the trap of wanting to see either myself or the people I coach get better and more productive. This frames my own thinking – for example that ‘things will get worse before they get better’ and that the period of uncertainty is a bad thing when first starting a coaching relationship which questions underlying assumptions. Rather, it would help us all to see this as part of a journey towards development which gets us to where we want to go. We do actually see this take place as time goes on with coaching clients – when the goal starts as being more productive or a promotion, it often transcends this to something deeper, such as what the individual’s values and goals are, and what would lead to them being happy or fulfilled. The solution rarely is actually is about having ‘more’ to find fulfilment, instead it’s something ‘different’.

So I’m looking to reframe my own thoughts around growth. Whilst it can be a helpful concept in certain circumstances (e.g. when you are a child and looking to grow physically) when the word is overused it can often bring in underlying context which can often be unhelpful as it builds an assumption that ‘better’ is more, and faster, and this is often not the case.

I would love to hear your thoughts about how you frame growth, and whether you agree (or disagree!) with my thinking.

What can organisations do to tackle the Gender Pay Gap?

This month, many countries held their ‘Equal Pay Day’. This is the day in which figuratively women stop earning compared to men due to the gender pay gap. In the UK, this was announced to be 18 November – based upon the fact that the gender pay gap is 11.9% in the UK. Other European countries such as France, Germany, Spain and Belgium also mark this day, all of which tend to fall around the first few weeks of November. Indeed, the European Commission marks the 10 November as the European Equal Pay Day – based upon an average of 14.1% lower pay compared to men.

Whilst in theory, men and women legally are expected be paid the same amount for the work they do, in practice this does not lead to the egalitarian society that we might hope for. Women are often past up for promotion to senior levels, or are undervalued for the work they do. Stereotypes still exist around the type of work women are capable of, meaning many organisations still do not see women as leaders, or typecast as secretaries.

Some high-paying fields such as engineering and IT are heavily represented by men which further skews the balance. Likewise, the gender pay gap also highlights unbalanced societal norms, where childcare are expected to be covered by women, whereas this is not expected of men. Similarly, the figure can also be further skewed by low percentage of women participating in the workforce in the first place, meaning at times the situation can be more stark than the figure itself shows.

Whilst Gender Pay Gap is clearly a wider societal issue, there is certainly far more that organisations themselves can do to tackle the problem. Unfortunately, the numbers have stayed consistent (and in the example of the UK actually gone up this year), meaning that we cannot expect the passage of time to solve the problem. Instead, here are some suggested ways for organisations to approach the problem:

understand own gender balance internally – Organisations could do more to internally investigate their own gender balance. A step further would be to start looking at whether there are pay disparities that have arisen over the years of promotions and salary negotiations. Some firms are now looking to correct these discrepencies by either offering top-ups to lesser paid females at the same grade, or by creating clearer salary bands which harmonise pay.
maternity and return to work schemes – Whilst generally we are seeing a generally balanced split of men and women entering the workforce in professional jobs, a large issue is women leaving work during pregnancy and maternity and not returning. This often places women having to make a choice between family and career, with corporate inflexibility making this feel a binary choice. Organisations can do more to put in place return to work schemes, regular check-ins during maternity and better policies to support women as they go through maternity leave and encourage their return afterwards.
Increase participation of women in sector – Certain sectors have systemic issues around underrepresentation of women. A commonly cited example is the lack of female STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Maths) graduates, meaning there is a lack of representation in this space in the workplace. Organisations have looked at developing a better pipeline of staff by supporting girls participation in these areas, for example through coding clubs or other initiatives. This does not just apply for technology though, but also other sectors such as construction where more could be done to make girls feel this is a viable career pathway for them.
reviewing internal culture – It is vital that an organisation itself does not simply chase numbers of women, but instead also looks at how the organisation is run, and how genuinely inclusive it might be. Many organisations do not realise that their processes and work culture can be exclusionary for women. For example, in tech companies which are often male dominated, they may have a drinking culture which may mean that a working mother is unable to progress due to not going for a drink after work due to childcare, therefore not being seen as a ‘team player’ and being passed up for opportunities.
Shifting performance management and HR policies – Organisations should review how they value their employees and see how they can make their workplaces more inclusive, for example introducing flexible hours and more options for part-time working and job-share roles. Importantly, those who benefit from these schemes should also be seen as viable for promotion as well. Another practical way to tackle this is to support the creation of a women’s network which can help women support one another within an organisation as well as advocate for more inclusive policies.

These are some of the ways organisations can tackle issues of gender within their organisation, though I am sure there are many other ways that I have neglected to mention here.

What do you think organisations can do to tackle the gender pay gap?

Why I chose to leave my government career

In the last few weeks, I’ve connected with a number of individuals interested in knowing more about what it’s like to leave the UK Civil Service. So I thought it might be an interesting chance to write about why I chose to leave, what opportunities lie elsewhere and some of the issues I have had to face in doing so.

I’m going to talk about my own experience particularly working as an official in the UK government. Nonetheless, many of the points here will likely be relevant to anyone who is currently finding themselves interested in their next move, particularly so if you are either feeling a little stuck or in need of a new challenge.

I joined the Department for Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy (BEIS) in 2017. Prior to that, I had shorter, placement and internship experiences in HM Treasury, the European Commission and the Foreign and Commonwealth Office. So in total I had spent around five years in the policy making space.

My time at BEIS was definitely a positive one, and I would certainly recommend spending time in the UK Civil Service for anyone who may be interested. I gained a wide range of policy-making skills, spanning several varied roles and I took advantage of learning opportunities by building my own personal qualifications. In my four years there, I gained a Level 6 Diploma in Leadership and Management and became a certified practitioner Agile Project Manager. I also went on a number of training courses including a development programme over the course of the year. BEIS in all was a great opportunity for me to learn.

Like any employer, it was not all sunshine and rainbows. Working on Brexit for a number of years took its toll, and whilst the developments meant more job opportunities internally (which meant I was able to get promoted faster than usual), it also led to me at times working in poorly structured teams, sometimes with unsupportive and underskilled managers who had been promoted quickly without a whole lot of management experience.

I also became exhausted with the change, I had numerous director changes, Group name changes, policy shifts, ministerial changes and a few elections in my time. Brexit felt like a never-ending treadmill of new deadlines and changing goalposts, with pretty unrealistic expectations of what civil servants were meant to achieve.

In the last year or so, I found it particularly destabilising working under the most recent government. Namely in its public attacks on Civil Servants, who were often blamed for many issues publicly by Ministers, as well as being used as economic tools by being ordered during COVID to get back into our London offices to buy sandwiches and restart the economy.

I worked on Diversity and Inclusion issues throughout my time in government, and it became increasingly difficult under a Government who railed against a ‘woke agenda’, including within Government. This meant suddenly activities being arm-twisted away from ‘above’, including a lot of progress being halted due to some Special Adviser somewhere not liking what we did. It’s no wonder that a lot of BAME colleagues I know have recently left, many of which who were pioneers in advancing race and wider diversity issues.

On top of this all, I realised that the chances of me progressing further was pretty slim. Due to the way the Civil Service is structured, there are few opportunities for progression after a certain point of seniority. I also became growingly disillusioned at how I saw my white colleagues get promoted past me, often to find them having mediocre management skills which would often make my life a nightmare for the first 6-12 months as they actually learnt how to do their role. This happened to me several times.

I also realised my value and additional qualifications I had gained were not really valued – instances included senior officials ignoring advice around project management (despite sending me on a project management course!), and all my efforts around diversity and inclusion being boiled down to a £500 voucher, and when I would use these examples in job applications internally I was often sifted out as these seemingly not ‘the right types of examples’.

So with a mixture of disillusionment within Government and an impending deadline of Brexit, I decided I wanted to move to the Continent to build my career in the EU policy-making space. For me this was a culmination of decisions based around my personal-life (where do I want to live?) and wanting to try something outside of government with a different set of experience and more space for creativity.

It is quite scary moving out to the big wide world outside government. The system encourages people to stay within, to the point where people move around constantly whenever they get tired with their roles. It can be pretty easy to lose touch with how employers work outside of government, and how the application process can greatly differ externally.

The unfortunate reality is that job hunting is a lot of work, and it took me many months of re-learning the rules of the game and building a better understanding of what I really wanted to do before I ultimately left. This often leads to people sometimes feeling they get a little stuck within their roles, often finding themselves in a spiral of being unsatisfied in a role because of the pressure and expectations, meaning they do not have time to genuinely search for a new role. I certainly empathise with this situation, though unfortunately it is something you may have to grind out.

Now being on the other side of it, I would certainly recommend leaving, if not to only have it as an option. There are often far more interesting roles than we might realise outside of government, with a growing level of flexibility and opportunities that would suit your particular needs, often that government might not be able to (like in my example when it came to physical location). On top of that, returning to Government is actually far easier than previously, meaning you can leave and join again. Ironically for me, by leaving I’ve given myself a better space to progress and return at a higher level than I would have by staying.

The pain points will often be a mixture of overwhelm at what is out there, as well as uncertainty around how to translate government experience into what recruiters are asking for. This will take time and commitment, so if you are considering leaving I would highlight how much time and effort it takes. But being on the other side of the process, I would certainly recommend it.

I hope this article is helpful in talking through some of the things you might find yourself going through, or simply to understand more about why people leave organisations. I’d love to hear from you if you found this helpful!