Tag: #wellbeing

The lost art of keeping discipline

Although I’ve learnt the game of ‘celebrating my successes’, it’s always been one that I’ve done because I’m meant to, rather than because I feel naturally inclined.

In my previous management roles, I used to talk to my staff about the importance of ‘cashing the cheque’ – when a good piece of work had been done, it was important to sing about it from the rooftops. Otherwise, all that hard graft would most likely go unnoticed. I accepted this as part of the game, even if I had a personal distaste for it.

Yet there is a fundamental issue when our value comes from the showing rather than the doing. The laborious, harder graft has become devalued.

On Family and Duty

The subject of duty has been deeply imprinted in my mind this week. It relates to the idea of expectations and roles, passed down by family and society.

I went back to see my parents in London, where I also reconnected with the works of my grandfather, Delwar Hussain Chowdhury. Before his death in 1977, he wrote many poems that my father compiled after his death.

Living life in a protective bubble

When I hear the word bubble these days, it’s often used in a somewhat pejorative sense. In fact, I’m probably the one using it in a critical manner. I often lament people living too much in their own comfortable bubble, or indeed the Brussels infamous ‘EU bubble’.

Yet this week I reflected that there is some value in having a sense of bubble around us. For me specifically, I’ve started imagining the idea of having a protective bubble whenever I am in social situations. This helps me stay grounded and give a sense of safety, wherever I might be.

Well, where did that year go?

I wasn’t planning on doing an end-of-year recap. Mainly because I had lost all sense of time. I barely understand it’s December, let alone that tomorrow is 2026.

Yet when I realised that 2025 was about to end, I was hit with a sense of shock. I could barely recall where 2025 went. And I don’t mean that in a whimsical ‘time flies when you’re having fun’ sort of thing. I mean it in a – I have massive blanks in my memory of what even happened – kind of way.

Choosing a more private life

For the last number of years, my modus operandi has been to increase my visibility. More networking, more connecting and more socialising.

In truth, I’m not sure I was particularly successful at it. I’ve built some good connections along the way, but they have broadly remained at surface level. Whilst it’s nice to have acquaintances, many end up being a case of mutually watching one other’s Instagram stories. I might have a conversation every now and then. It could be after a few months. Sometimes, it’s after a few years.

For some, it is understandable. We live in distant places. Regular physical interaction is not possible. It was my choice, after all to up sticks and move from my country of birth. For others, it’s just simply a case of diverging life paths. We are different people, and so the connection has naturally loosened.
But often, it’s not about distance.

The signs of a renaissance

For the first time in around two years, I’ve had several days in a row where I’ve woken up without a sense of fatigue or dread.

Around two months ago, I remember having a day where I felt pretty good. I could get up, go out and doing things without any real issue. Is this what it is to live again? It was remarkable how easy everything felt.

But that was not a sustained feeling. The day after I was back in an energy dip. It was quite frustrating. Yet it at least reminded me what life is meant to feel like.

The key when you get locked out

We often use the metaphors of ‘keys’ and ‘doors’ in the world of personal development.

But on Monday, it had a far more literal meaning for me.

When taking the bins out, I shut the door behind me. I didn’t realise I didn’t have my key, effectively locking myself out.

It’s the sort of general mishap that we all face at some point in our lives. But it’s not so much about the event itself, but what we tell ourselves about it.

Connecting the fragments back together

Each of us has our own ‘personal narrative’. It reflects how we see ourselves, and so also how we see the world. For example, some people speak with a timidness. They talk about how they’re nothing special. To them, they had a ‘boring’ upbringing.

It’s not a surprise that such people aren’t particularly proud about where they’re from. Nor do they tend to be as confident either.

Compare that to someone who has a much more involved story about how they grew up. Their tales of upbringing can sound like a dazzling adventure.

The big irony is that these two stories could be the exact same person. It’s not really the history that matters, but the story crafted from it.

This is something I’ve understood. I’ve worked hard to shift my personal narrative from one that feels quite tragic to one of growth. Yet the last few weeks have also demonstrated a further layer that I never realised. My personal narrative was missing large segments.

Seeing the purging as the purification

When we’re looking to improve, we often think that it’s all about building upon our existing knowledge. We often talk about ‘growth’, and ‘improvement’.
But if we only build upon what we have today, we are relying upon the foundations that we had built earlier on in our life. These foundations are pretty shaky and unstable.
I previously worked with a coach who would regularly talk about this. The work was really to clearing out the dog turd underneath to create a new, healthy foundation. From here, we can truly build anew.
Many people, no matter how much learning or introspection they do, seem to keep repeating their mistakes. It’s generally because they do not address the real root issues.

The secret all this time was Ghee

There is commonality in every individual action we take. But if we go with the common approach, it’s unlikely to fit us as an individual.

Whenever we take an action, it connects us with the whole. Humans eat, sleep, work. In this, we share a common thing that binds us as a society.

But if we are guided only by what is commonly done, it’s unlikely to really suit us. Just because ‘the norm’ is to get an office job, does not mean that this is right for us. And just because the average amount of sleep required is around 8 hours, this does not mean 8 hours sleep is actually right for us either.