I spoke to someone recently who remarked that I sounded quite relieved when I told her I felt like I could just concentrate on just living for the next few months.
Last week, I wrote about how we can better integrate the different areas of our lives. The natural consequence of that we receive an economy of scale. It also means we reduce the sense of feeling guilty for not doing enough.
For me, I would feel like I could not ‘complete’ all of my goals within the timeframe I had put on myself, nor within the hours of the day. The mixture of career, leisure, fitness, coaching and writing felt like a constant juggling act.
I’ve worked a lot to make myself more effective. The work around shifting mindset has done wonders – I’m far more effective in many areas and I have a far more fulfilling life than I did before. Yesterday was the first weekend day where I had nothing planned in four weeks, whilst Friday was the first ‘evening off’ with nothing scheduled in the last 10 days, which included a trip to London.
On the one hand, it is great how I can do so many more things within my 24 hour cycle. The work I’ve done on myself has definitely transformed my life, and I am seizing far more of what life has to offer.On the other hand, having such a packed schedule does not bring the best out of me. If I feel like I am constantly doing things it can start to feel exhausting. I’ve also felt quite disheartened when I look at how hard I’ve been trying with my different goals, only to find relatively modest returns.
My recent rut has been to feel a little stuck, and I’ve felt quite demotivated. Everything I’ve been doing has felt like the answer is just patience, and a lot of the fun has fallen away. I’ve noticed myself being a little passive with my job. My health goals has felt like a game of patience and grinding. Whilst my writing and coaching has also been less active as I’ve questioned which way to take it.Life has felt a little stagnant.
But the relief came when I realised that I didn’t need to make this so complicated. The moment of clarity came last weekend when attending the LAMRON intensive (a 3 personal development workshop in London). I can really simplify what I’m doing so that it doesn’t need to feel like I am having to project manage each area of my life.
Right now, my goal is to focus upon going out in the world and connecting with people.From a career perspective, I’ve worked in policy for over 8 years. I think I’ve become a little tired of it recently, and it would do me good to reignite my enthusiasm for what I do. I’ve already noticed how going out, attending events and meeting people is give some stimulation after a lethargic-feeling summer.
For my health goals, I’ve been going to a new studio where I enjoy the ambiance more. I’ve been doing new dance classes which have injected some novelty and fun. I’ve booked to attend the same class on a regular basis so I can feel a better sense of continuity and connection. Previously my attendance of classes at my last yoga studio were sporadic, and the nature of the place meant there was less chance to connect with others there.
With the coaching and writing, everything has felt quite slow. Whilst I’ve really worked on improving my skill, I feel like the impact is still relatively limited. This is not to take away the fact that I know what I do really impacts people (every so often I get messages from people telling me as much), but I know that there are a lot more people that could benefit from hearing what I have to say.
A bloody-minded focus upon building genuine connections keeps this a clear and easy focus for me. I’ve built a solid base for myself here in Brussels to do this. I’ve also done the work on myself to know I don’t really need to ‘try’ so hard to impress others. It’s instead simply a case of showing up consistently and being myself.
If there’s any message you take from this article, let it be this – keep it simple. No matter what your current goals and ambitions are, the simpler the action the greater clarity you have.
And it’s in clarity that we produce our greatest results.